If you took all my gambling advice, and pushed all your chips to the center of the table this week you will have broken even…if you weasel on your payments. Here is a look at my predictions and what actually happened, which is not too far off from my forecast.
This week should really start shaking down the dross, although the Rams and Colts have proven that they belong among the Dolphins, and Panthers. The McNabb experiment is dead in Valhalla, Kolb is an enigma in Arizona, Grossman an LOL in Washington, Tebo is either a plague or a miracle, and Alex Smith an OMG! in San Fransisco.
Jacksonville at Texas
Texans rolled to a win and Jacksonville stumbled to a win. Texans win this one, and next year it will be Jaguars IN Los Angeles. in Los Angeles they are already trying to come up with names.
Texans 30, Jaguars 3
Actual Result: Texans 24, Jags 14. Close enough for free-lance work, folks.
Miami at NY Giants
The gambling line is Giants by 10. It should be by ten touchdowns, but I will play it conservative, too.
Giants 51, Dolphins 10
Actual Result: Giants 20, Dolphins 17. The Giants dropped 30 points getting off the bus and the Dolphins were lucky enough to find seven of them.
Indian-however-you-spell-it at Nashville
This upset special is going to see the beginning of “Paintermania” It won’t last long, though.
Colts 16, Titans 14
Actual Result: Titans 27, Colts 10. *shakes crystal ball in angry manner*
Arizona at Baltimore
Experts talk about how angry Ravens are going to be after last week. Yeah, because the Cardinals are absolutely jolly over their season so far. Well things change today.
Cardinals 23, Ravens 11
Actual Result: Ravens 30, Cardinals 27. This was a game in which both teams made a strong statement.
New Orleans at Saint Louis
Saints will wonder whatever happened to all those points they scored against the Dolphins. Rams sans Bradford don’t matter.
Saints 26, Rams 9
Actual Result: Rams 31, Saints 21. I had the Saints winning this by 17, and they only lost by ten. That’s almost theory of relativity type stuff.
Washington at Buffalo
Redskins new quarterback had a so-so week last week. Today will prove that it was luck.
Bills 32, Redskins 19
Actual Result: Bills 23, Washington 0. I failed to take in to account the Bills drive to avenge the 1992 Superbowl Loss to Redskins
Detroit at Denver
The Lions are who we thought they were. So are the Broncos, and Tebow…?
Broncos 34, Lions 20
Actual Result: Lions 45, Broncos 10. God already sick of “Tebowing.” Tebow can take solace that this doesn’t come near matching Elways worst super bowl loss, plus, Tebow has yet to line up behind a guard.
New England at Pittsburgh
This game is going to be as ugly as Ben Rapelsburgers face with the Patriots getting the last punch.
Patriots 13, Steelers 10
Actual Result: Steelers 25, Patriots 17. Well, the Patriots got the last punch, but the Steelers ducked it.
Cleveland at San Fransisco
Bengal’s sister team puts up a good fight and stuns the 49ers who had begun to think that they were led by Bill Walsh and Joe Montana. Welcome to Pumpkinville, sweethearts.
Browns 16, 49ers, 15
Actual Result: 49’ers 20, Browns 10. Alex Smith riding the Frank Gore Pony Express while yelling, “Yehaw!” is not quite pumpkinville, but they’re on their way there. Plus the image is disturbing.
Cincinnati at Seattle
The most amazing thing about this matchup is that I spelled Cincinnati the first time without spellcheck, and NAILED it. I would pick Seattle in this game, but their coach is Pete Carrol. And their quarterback isn’t Hasslebeck.
Bengals 31, Seahawks 21
Actual Result: Bengals 34, Seahawks 12. NFL opponents not as intimidated by Pete Carrol’s silver hair as they were in college.
Dallas at Philadelphia
Tony Romo is genuinely a good person. Micheal Vick is too, except that he tortures animals and cant’ handle it when things go bad. They will go a little bit worse for this sick pud after tonights game
Cowboys 33, Eagles 20
Actual Result: Eagles 34, Cowboys 7. God doesn’t hate dogs. He’s just loading up the karma-cannon for Vick.
San Diego at Kansas City
There was a country hit years ago called, “When Two Worlds Collide” San Diego still trying to figure out how they lost to the Jets, Chiefs still trying to figure out how they beat the Raiders. Tonight, all will be revealed.
Chargers 43, Chiefs, 16
Actual Result: Chiefs 23, Chargers 20. Norv Turner finally doing his choking in October instead of January?
Happy Halloween
See you next Friday!