You are cleaning out your young teenager’s room and open what you think is a gym bag and find the remnants of a 30 pack of beer. You take a deep breath and call him into the room to explain. After a few hours of stories and some resistance you finally get something that appears to be the truth. He is too young to be drinking, he is drinking too much and the deceptive quality of his shifting stories is concerning. What do you do?First, remain calm. Going ballistic and grounding him until he is 90 will only put him on the defensive and force him to pull further away from adult guidance. Second, set some clear limits. One example may be: “all your social activities are canceled until you can be truthful about this and we come up with a plan to handle this better in the future”. That may take 15 minutes or it may take three days but this gives your kid responsibility for solving the problem. Third, make sure he or she understands the dangers of drinking, the dangers of drinking at a young age and some of the social norm information that proves that most kids his or her age do not drink (despite perceptions).
Although most teenagers believe they are smarter than anyone on the planet, it is always surprising to discover what they do not know about the effects of alcohol and other drugs.
Finally, keep the dialogue open. Make sure he or she understands why you see this as a problem (you do, don’t you?) and try to enlist his or her agreement to not repeat this behavior.
Our kids are going to do many things outside of our watchful eyes. We cannot follow them around or chain them in their rooms (although many parents have considered this). We can help keep them informed, help them make good decisions and maintain open communication. Beyond that, parents can only cross their fingers.
If you are underage, It is incredibly easy to find someone over 21 to buy a 30 pack for you. The local wooded areas are filled with beer cans, some empty and some full, testifying to the youth crowd’s drinking behavior outside of homes, bars and restaurants. Some parents have attempted to address this by hosting underage drinking gatherings in their homes. Some just look the other way while others have actually purchased the alcohol for the kids. This unfortunately runs afoul of the social host liability laws and there is at least one family in a neighboring community that stands to lose their house in legal action based on this statute.
Supporting underage drinking in a “safe” environment may help with one set of problems but it does not take into account how damaging alcohol use can be at younger ages. Central nervous system development is still very much in process as is emotional development in the early teen years. There are also other, substantial risk factors involved when kids drink. A recent survey of students enrolled at Recovery High Schools showed that over 60% of the females had been sexually assaulted while under the influence. Although only 1% of males reported similar experiences, it is generally believed that this is under-reported. (http://www.recoveryschools.org/resources_links_docs.html)
Underage drinkers also are very often inexperienced drinkers and can easily drink themselves into an alcoholic overdose. If they are lucky, their friends may be able to get them to an emergency room. Other times, they die in the woods. Interdicting alcohol sales to minors is one part of the solution but there is still a lot of work to do.
Most kids (and many adults as well) do not know how easy it is to drink yourself into an alcohol overdose. The human body, specifically the liver, can only process about ½ ounce of alcohol per hour. This is the equivalent of about one drink. Most kids consume more than this in an hour and often for more than an hour. Although adults may sometimes consume large quantities of alcohol and not suffer any adverse consequences, kids are not used to operating under the influence and are affected much more quickly.
Try This Exercise With Your Kid:
For an interesting exercise with your child (if in middle school or older), Go to http://www.intox.com/drinkwheel.aspx (or Google “intoximeter” and go to one of the suggested web sites).
Consider the following scenario: Your son/daughter is hanging out with some friends and there is alcohol available. Between 8:30 PM and 11:30 PM he/she consumes 6 beers. Enter the numbers requested and see what your youngster’s Blood Alcohol Level is. Then refer to the chart below.
Blood Alcohol Level Effect on Kids
0-.05 Mild euphoria, feeling of relaxation, loosening of inhibitions
.06-.10 Impaired judgement, unsteadiness, slurred speech, impaired reactions (eye-hand coordination)
.11-.15 Possibility of passing out, vomiting, excessive emotionality, paranoia
.15 and above Loss of consciousness, vomiting, breathing difficulties, possible loss of bladder control, possible coma
With some of our middle schoolers weighing in at 50-60 pounds, you can see how easy it is for problems to develop. My colleagues in the local hospital emergency rooms tell me they regularly see kids, including middle schoolers brought in with alcohol overdoses. There are two ways an alcohol overdose is typically treated. If the kid is conscious, they will give him or her a liquid mixture of charcoal to drink. This guarantees that any alcohol remaining in the stomach will be immediately and forcefully vomited out of the system. If the kid is unconscious, they will insert a tube down the throat into the stomach and pump out the remaining alcohol. None of this is pleasant.
And these are the lucky ones. If an unconscious kid is left alone and vomits, he or she aspirates the vomit and drowns. And, if the blood alcohol level gets high enough, which can happen when kids are passing around a bottle of vodka, for example, the chemical properties of the alcohol will induce a coma and signal the central nervous system to shut down.
At a local Youth Summit last March, we heard loud and clear from the kids that what they want most is information. Research data is demonstrating that one of the most effective methods for preventing underage alcohol and drug use is ongoing discussion and interactions between kids and parents. Talk to your kids, learn with them and help them stay safe.