Mental illness affects all of us in one way or another. It is essential to learn the bare bones about supporting them, to avoid misunderstanding. Mentally ill people rely on several coping skills at one time, but an important one is seeking a support person. You can become a very valuable asset to someone’s recovery, and maybe learn something.
The easiest way to start is by educating yourself about whichever mental illness you want to understand. There are so many ways to do this. You can do a Google search on what you want to know. There are usually blogs dedicated to certain illnesses or mental illness in general that can offer you a perspective. Social media offers perspective, but beware the false advertising. Your local library or bookstore has a wealth of information, sometimes entire series of books on a mental illness. Another wonderful source of information is going to come from the person you want to understand. Just ask questions, most people will be honest with you on the subject as far as what they know.
Be present for the person you want to support. Offer to sit with them and have coffee if you think they are having a bad day. Try calling them from time to time just to check in and see what’s going on, or be willing to drive them to a doctor appointment or pharmacy to show your support. If you want to sit and listen, please actually listen to them talk. It is awful to see a blank look in a person’s eyes when you are trying to open up to them. And if you feel comfortable with them doing so, try asking them for a hug. Sometimes that’s the best medicine.
Study about and watch for the warning signs. Often mental illness involves the possibility of self-harm or thoughts of suicide. It is extremely urgent that you act on your instincts if someone mentions wanting to die. Calling 911 is only necessary if there is imminent harm or they have already done damage. Most of the time a phone call to their doctor or urging them to call a crisis line like 1-800-SUICIDE can be very helpful. Sometimes they need a ride to talk to a crisis counselor at a hospital or office somewhere.
Remember, mentally ill people are more than their mental illness. It is important to be a good friend. Be careful not to be too into their mental illness, they probably want to talk about a lot of other things too. If you are there for them when they need you… that is being a support. Return their calls and emails; offer a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen with. It doesn’t have to be difficult to be a support, just do it for the right reasons and you will both feel better.