As a single mother with a trail of broken relationships I started to figure out where I went wrong in the relationships that didn’t last.
I am a half way decent looking women, with goals and ambitions. I am smart, but I know how to act around people who are not so they don’t feel like I am pushing them around with intelligence. I can get along in most situations, with almost anyone. You would think it would be easy for me to find a nice guy…. As far as I can tell when looking at my past, there is no one to blame but myself.
All the signs that tell the relationship will go wrong are there in the beginning, but I ignored the warning signs and allowed my heart to be broken a few times.
So I have come to find a hints to know if he is Mr. Right, and how to avoided Mr. Right Now. “Just Looking” This could mean he is in a relationship, but would like to know if there are options out there for a quiet fling. Anytime a guy says he doesn’t know what he wants, or he is just testing the waters he is saying he is not ready for commitment. In most cases if you have a fling with a guy who openly says he doesn’t want commitment, you will never get that commitment from him.
“Looking for someone to hang out with” Might mean that he wants a girl who won’t give him a hard time about the other girls he hangs out with. Or it could mean he wants to take things slow and build a friendship first.
To find out which is the case, set your bar. Do not sleep with him until you get a relationship. It you sleep with him as “just friends” then you might not ever get more than that. “I want to hang out, but I am still in love with my ex…” Just don’t even go there. If a guy is still in love with is ex, and is not with them, then there is a reason he isn’t in a relationship with that girl.
In my last relationship the guy was in love with every ex he had. At first it seemed ok to be in a relationship with him, but when his high school sweetheart contacted him, he stopped coming to bed so he could stay up late to chat with her online. We were suppose to go to California together, but found out he made plans to see her while there.
I spent the week he was in California moving out into my own place. He came back fully believing he wanted to move back to CA to be with her. Take things slow in any new relationship. Give yourself rues and limits. Set your standards and stick to them even if you are lonely.
Stay away from heavy drinkers or drug abusers. Yes they might be fun at first but in the end they will choose their addiction over you every time.
I know that when you are lonely you want to jump into the first relationship offered to you, but by keeping your options open you are allowing yourself to be swept off you feet by Mr. Right.