The Nancy Grace Show was starting in just a few moments and he had to see it. Nancy was his Goddess of “Truth and Justice”, in fact his entire day was nothing more than a type of sexual foreplay leading up to the 10:00pm hour when the Nancy Grace Show came on and then he copulated mentally with her, followed of course by the post orgasmic smoke and sigh of satisfaction.
Moments before the show was scheduled to air he felt the movement deep in his bowels, oh no not now, he had everything laid out. His TV tray with a Hungry Man dinner its aroma wafting gently thru the room, his glass of PBR beer, slightly frosted of course sat next to it. The remote precisely located on the arm of his favorite chair so he could skip the commercials during the recording process.
He felt the movement again, this time lower in his bowels, with a moderate pressure indicating he needed to make the bathroom soon. He froze for a moment, undecided how to proceed he could not envision missing any of the show, after all Nancy might save the world tonight she might suddenly illuminate the world with her vast wisdom and reveal the answer to all questions, a single word from the Goddess might save humanity.
“Day 21,456 of the Nancy Holloway case”. The vision of mercy and justice quipped into the camera. “And justice for little Caylee 10 years later”.
The rumbling was more intense this time, demanding attention he had to make a choice, soil himself or risk hurriedly wiping which after a tumultuous deuce and one proceeded to scratch beneath the nose, unwittingly smearing residual traces of fecal matter tucked beneath the nails onto areas of the upper lip a most unfortunate situation but worth it for Nancy.
He dashed quickly down the hallway and seated himself; he at least had turned the volume up so he could hear his Goddess. He shook his head as Nancy addressed the horrible rumors that she was a money grubbing bitch who only cared about herself, and constantly convicted people in the court of public opinion without evidence.
NOT TRUE………….He knew that Nancy had been right about the Duke Lacrosse Team at least until the charges had been dropped, and the woman Nancy had been accused of pressuring into suicide, what horrible horrible lies she clearly was guilty of killing her own children, Nancy had said so after she was dead.
Even when the Duckett family blamed the Goddess for the suicide his love never failed or waivered this did nor did this deter our valiant super-hero in the least. Nay! As the Goddess herself put it, “truth is sometimes hard”. He nearly swooned as he recalled when she spoke these words, quickly accompanied by a massive bowel movement violent enough that he lifted himself off the seat to prevent fluid from splashing on him. Oh My.
He felt so blessed that he was living in a time when Nancy Grace blessed the airwaves, who knew what she might tackle next, world hunger, the cure for cancer, the answer to the creation of the universe. She was after all Goddess Nancy Grace.