As a parent to 11 children I’ve learned a few lessons along the way. My older children would tell you that they’ve suffered the most from my lack of parenting skills while my younger children have benefited from the lessons I’ve learned.
Being The Best Friend
Although I’ve never attempted to be my children’s best friend, I’ve had plenty of experience in dealing with foster children that have had this issue. Children need parents. Children don’t need to know the day to day issues between husband and wife, nor do they need to know other issues that adults face. They need parenting. They need to be taught right from wrong and raised to be good parents themselves.
Best friends should be children their own age. Trying to be your child’s best friend will backfire and hurt not only the child, but you as the parent as well.
Setting The Example
Although children don’t always realize it, they’re watching mom and dad and trying to follow in their footsteps. Parents need to lead by example. Don’t just tell your children to do chores, demonstrate to them how you want them done.
Don’t just tell your children not to gossip, set the example by not gossiping yourself. Whether it be complaining about the neighbors or repeating things you’ve heard elsewhere, the children are listening and learning by this example.
Don’t just tell children not to drink alcohol, do drugs or drive when under the influence, don’t do it yourself.
If parents aren’t setting a good example children eventually will start to doubt the parent and act out.
Not Getting Involved at School
Getting involved at your child’s school is important to your child. My daughter loves it when I volunteer to chaperon a field trip or bring snacks to her classroom. Taking a few minutes out of your day once or twice a year is so important to your child and something that he or she will remember for the rest of their life.
A bonus to getting involved at your child’s school is that you have more of an idea of what is going on. How the classroom is run and how your child is interacting with others. You don’t have to be involved with everything for this one to work, as said above, just doing something with your child’s class once or twice a year
Don’t make these parenting mistakes, be the parent you want your children to grow up and be.