COMMENTARY | When a person screams fire in a crowded movie theater, he is responsible for the carnage of trampled bodies that result. He is not free to scream “fire” unless there is, in fact, a fire. When a man is running for the highest office in the free world, the Presidency of the United States of America, he has no more right to scream “fire” than anyone else. This is exactly what Herman Cain has done when he stated that homosexuality is a choice on the ABC talk show, The View, on Tuesday, October 4, 2011.
Am I being too extreme? I don’t think so.
When Herman Cain and other intelligent individuals who have a significant voice in our society say that homosexuality is a choice, they espouse a certain belief structure that leads to violence, self-destruction, depression and even death.
If homosexuality is a choice, then heterosexuality is a choice.
In an interview uncovered by The Young Turks, Marcus Bachmann says, “…a child or preadolescent, particularly adolescent, will question and wonder about sexuality; that is nothing new under the sun since the beginning of time.” He goes on to say that just because a child may wonder about their sexuality doesn’t mean that they must go down the road of homosexuality.
Here’s the kicker: No straight person I have ever met has ever said they wondered if they might be gay at any point of their life. Are you straight? Have you ever wondered if you might be gay? Have you ever found someone of the same sex so appealing that you simply couldn’t get them out of your head, and you would do anything to be with that person? If you are straight, you probably had those feelings, but they were about someone of the opposite sex, right?
It’s the same thing for gay people. We have crushes when we’re kids… but my crushes were on Kristy McNichol (Family, Little Darlings) and Nancy McKeon (Facts of Life).
From the time I was a little girl (we’re talking 5 and 6 years old) I knew I was different. When some older boys in my neighborhood started calling me a “Lezzie”, I had no idea what they were talking about. Now, I do. I am a lesbian. And I was born this way. If you are a heterosexual, guess what? You were born that way, too. It’s okay. We won’t hold it against you.
If homosexuality is a choice, then “pray the gay away” programs would actually work.
Lisa Ling, on her show “Our America” (OWN), aired a documentary on the “Pray the Gay Away” concept. In the story, she highlighted a young man named Christian who was four years into a reparative therapy program with a local minister named Janet (herself a “former” lesbian).
In an interview that took place as Christian was giving Ms. Ling a driving-tour of his former haunts, she asked him, “Do you still struggle with [homosexuality] because I know you call Janet late at night?”
He replied, with an audible groan, “I describe it as bleeding out of my eyeballs.”
Lisa continued, “Do you still feel attracted to guys?”
“Yes, totally! Like sexually? Yeah. Like, way more than girls.”
When Christian found himself in a church where Janet, the minister of an ex-gay ministry, was speaking, he was dressed in drag. He was taking drugs, drinking to excess and his life was in shambles. I argue that giving up his destructive lifestyle did not have to include starving himself of human contact or the chance to meet the right guy, settle down and have a completely fulfilling life; even to the point of having a family if that is something he might desire.
At the time of the taping, he had refrained from sexual contact with men (and women) for four years. He is celibate, but he is still attracted to men. He is still homosexual.
Christian is a “success” story for reparative therapies. He is dealing with the issues of his sexual orientation in a way that makes him feel okay about himself, even though he is still gay. Most of the time, however, this is not the case. In many situations when a gay person is told that their “lifestyle” is a choice, they will try to change their sexual orientation. When prayer and therapy don’t work, they feel even more “defective” than they did before. They often engage in harmful, irresponsible choices that can lead to addiction and even death by accidental overdose, irresponsible living, or suicide.
Michael Bussee, an evangelical Christian and a gay man, was a pioneer in the ex-gay, “Pray the Gay Away” movement that started in the 1970s. He left the organization in 1979 after falling in love with another male, “ex-gay” leader. Because of the ex-gay movement they helped to create, they had both married women and had children. Those women and children were affected by this fallacy of reparative therapy, as well.
Isn’t it more responsible to acknowledge that homosexuality is not a choice-that we are all different and we can all contribute to society in a healthy and productive manner? When society can acknowledge this, those gay individuals who feel lost, abandoned, and “defective” will be able to raise their heads high and be the amazing people they truly are.
For Mr. Cain, a person of influence in this country, to put forth the misconception that being gay is a choice, is wholly irresponsible. His rhetoric is heard by millions, including young gay people who are struggling with their own identity in a society that constantly tells them they are diseased and defective. Shame on you, Mr. Cain.
Sources:
ABC’s The View, Interview with Herman Cain
Lisa Ling’s Our American, OWN
Enormous personal experience and totally fabulous insight, thank you very much
Beyond Ex-gay website, Apology of Michael Bussee
More from this Contributor:
Repent You Sinners! Reject the Gay Lifestyle!
The Number of Gay People in the US is Hard to Measure
Why You Can’t Vote on Whom I Choose to Marry