Does Your Preschooler Really Have to Go to All Those Birthday Parties?

If you have a child in preschool, and particularly if your child has a large preschool class, you no doubt are being invited to several birthday parties per month, if not more. At first glance, you may feel honored that your child is being invited to so many parties, but after awhile all of those invites can become a bit tedious and you may start asking yourself if you really have to go to all of them.

Here are a few points to consider:

Most Parents Take an All-Inclusive Mindset. Many parents of preschoolers will indeed invite the entire class to attend their child’s party because they don’t want to leave anyone out. At this age, kids may have some favorite friends they are growing closer to, but they haven’t really formed any full and lasting bonds. Some days they play with this group of kids, and the other day, they may play with that group. So it’s easier to invite the entire class, and often better so that little feelings aren’t hurt, too.

The Cost of Presents. You may not think much about the cost of a $10 or $20 present here or there, but if you are heading to a birthday party every weekend, this does indeed turn into a regular part of your budget. Often for this reason alone, while the parents throwing the party may be inclusive, the parents of the invitees may want to be more selective about attending only a handful of parties here and there if finances are a concern.

Nurturing Friendships. Kids get plenty of time to play together in school, but getting together outside of school is a great way to nurture friendships. Keep in mind that many preschool age kids will indeed go to elementary school together or more run into each other again in extracurricular activities out of school. So once preschool is over, that isn’t the end of the relationships for these kids by any means.

Meeting Parents. It can be hard to meet the parents of your kids’ friends in those five minutes you spend dropping off and picking up from school each day. Parties are a great place to meet the parents and really get to know them. You can even set up some play dates and help your child develop more significant relationships by attending some of the birthday parties.

It’s a Two-Way Street. Not all parents keep tabs on who attended their child’s birthday party, but you might be surprised at just how many actually do. Failing to respond with an RSVP to a birthday party invitation can make you look just plain rude, and of course you cannot attend all of the parties, but you should definitely try to attend those parties of the friends your child is closest to. You really never know which parents are actually keeping tabs, and your own child may be heartbroken if his or her best of friends didn’t attend their own birthday party!

The bottom line is that you don’t have to go to every birthday party your child is invited to attend (and given the time and cost involved, you may not want to), but there are some great benefits to attending those that you can!

Here are a few other articles written by this author:

How Positive is Your Parenting?

Helping Your Kids Through Fights with Friends

Kids and Friend Drama: When to Step In


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