Let’s Try a Bunnings DIY Workshop

Hasn’t that Bunnings hardware store become like a Fitness First success, they’re everywhere. Bunnings has stuff for anything and everything, but you know what, sometimes they don’t have everything, which is un-bel-iv-able looking at the mammoth size of the store. Hands up who likes to get creative, like using your hands, no not in that way all you dirty rotten scoundrels. It’s the Bunnings Do-It-Yourself (D.I.Y. – hopefully I won’t die on the way and get put six-foot under in the Bunnings graveyard) workshop.
The word Bunnings almost sounds like Bunnies, like hot and sexy bunny females teaching you, how to (coff coff)….sorry I wasn’t paying attention, I was staring at….um, can you say that again Ms. Bunnings Bunny.
Usually it’s the guys who collect themselves together, and pack it into the Bunnings D.I.Y. workshop, almost like packing it into the footy scrum and speaking the footy scrum language, which really does sound like mumbo-jumbo to everyday folk. Then comes the workshop instructor (like the referee) to bring the boys under control.
So what is it about these Bunnings D.I.Y. workshops. Firstly, it’s mainly guys (can you hear that stampede coming, the females having something to say). Where’s all the gals in this democratic society. Yeah, there’s girls, the Bunnings Bunnies, yeah – go Bunnies, go Bunnies, go Bunnies. I wonder if the guys would actually learn anything or if first aid is close at hand with the hypnotising affect of the Bunnings Bunnies. The gals could be the guys Santa’s little helper, an off-sider, no not on the side. Oh I bet she’ll be helping you alright – ‘Need a hand with that glue?’.
Secondly, it’s on the weekend. What does the weekend mean to a bloke? You guessed it, watching the sport and news on tv, having a BBQ with either the mates or extended extended family and some ‘do not disturb’ long love-making sessions with the mrs, and oh yeah, doing some handyman stuff in the yard cleaning this (oh Mr Hart what a mess) and making that (will you take a look at that masterpiece). So this Bunnings D.I.Y. workshop had better be good. I mean, there’s the guys….and, the Bunnings Bunnies (concentration guys concentration).
Looking at a Bunnings D.I.Y. doozie is like watching a stage show, a theatre at play. No time for play people, it’s back to work. Perhaps the Bunnings Bunnies (yes I’ve mentioned them a number of times; obsession I know) can get some competition from a Tim the Tool Man Taylor (tv show Home Improvement) double-whammie stand-up act and goof-ball catastrophe of a workshop; quick take cover. Hopefully they left the sleepy grandpa workshop-instructor back at home in bed (maybe that is where you should be) with the Rock-a-By-Baby nursery rhyme in the background making it even worse – ‘…and when the bar breaks the baby will fall’ (now wasn’t that a Bunnings D.I.Y. workshop disaster; better luck next time folks).