Parenting Test

It has long been observed that in order for a person to succeed at a vocation they must study, take exams and engage in a period of self reflection. However, no such “rules” apply to parenthood. Indeed the only requirement is physiological capacity. Yet the job of parenting requires more of a financial investment and devotion of longer hours over an extended period of time than any academic program or career one can take the time to investigate and select.
It is my assertion that parenting is emmmensely important and entitled to much more thought and planning than the ordinary consideration afforded vocational choices–certainly more than getting a drivers license. As such, the following set of questions are the beginning questions of a Parenting Test set up to help expectant parents and new parents begin to analyze ,understand and communicate about their perceptions and hopes of parenthood.
Question 1.
What does this child mean to me/us? Parent’s underlying perceptions, fantasies, hopes, etc. can have a significant impact on their relationship with their infant and throughout the childs development. Some children may be seen as a replacement for a loss or perhaps proof of masculinity and/or femininity. A child may be seen as “marital glue” or perhaps as a “gift” for parents who may have had difficulties conceiving. (This might contribute to problems down the line in that it is hard.to discipline a “gift”). Most parents have a rich and elaborate schema of fantasies and hopes about their child which is healthy. A single or limited perception of the child may lead to difficulties.
Question 2. How do you see yourself as a mother or father?
Quesrion 3. What in your past would you to repeat in parenting your child?
Question 4. What in your past would you like to NOT repeat in parenting your own child?
Question 5. What in your spouse’s past would you like to repeat and/or avoid?
This beginning set of questions will be expanded on. There is no time limit! Please take the time to think, analyze and communicate with your mate–just as you would for any other important undertaking.