Like all other types of human development, sexual development begins at birth. It has been observed that getting sexual pleasure through genital stimulation starts the first few moments of life. Parents have reported that their newborn boys have erections. These erections are controlled through the nervous system, and can occur spontaneously, or in response to various types of stimulation.
By the first year of their lives, both boys and girls can reach their genitals and demonstrate their feelings of pleasure when being rubbed.
At this stage, most parents recognize this as being a normal phase in their lives. It can lead to problems, however, if a parent does not realize this as being normal. It has been known that in some families, a mother may slap a child’s hand if he/she reaches for the genitals. Too much negative attention to this can lead to negative sexuality later in life, as I’m very well aware.
As infants get a little older, they derive other pleasures through oral gratification of feeding and sucking. When they become toddlers, they develop more pleasures through socialization. Examples of this type of pleasure is through interactions with parents, sisters and brothers, other children, toys, and food.
A renewed interest in genital manipulation can occur again at the ages of three or four. Both sexes may masturbate at this stage in their lives. Masturbation to orgasm is common in this age group. Parents are to realize that this is a natural experience, and it is not to be condemned.
It is a good idea, however, that parents explain to their child about when and where it is appropriate to masturbate, without making it sound shameful.
Children between the ages of three and six have a lot of curiosity about their genitals. Many times, they are known to compare their sexual organ to that of their parents. They are also curious about children of the opposite sex.
When my daughter was a little girl, I’ll always remember her reaction when she noticed her little cousin’s penis, when he went to the bathroom. The expression on her face was something I will never forget!!!
When she came home that day, it was even more interesting, when she took her doll and grabbed a butter knife and said, “I’m going to cut your penis off.” Since I had read a great deal about Freud and his penis envy theory, I said to myself, “By golly Freud, you are so right.”
Source: Taking Care of Your Child by Robert Pantell, M.D., James Fries, M.D., Donald Vickery, M.D. and Harriet Steinberg, author of this content