Carolyn Ingalls, the loving wife of Charles Ingalls on Little House on the Prairie, was the perfect submissive wife. She was a domestic diva and she rarely stepped out of her role. Today, Carolyn would be considered unrealistic and foolish for blindly trusting her husband. In 2012, very few women want to be submissive to their men, but why? Is submissive the new four letter word of our era?
Many women have decided against submission to their men for several reasons. Here are the top five, in my opinion:
Misuse: Some men feel a submissive woman should give him whatever he wants, whenever he wants it for nothing in return. Independence: The idea of being submissive contradicts the lifestyle of a successful, smart and independent woman. We love our men but we don’t want to sacrifice our dreams to please them. Status: Many women have been put in the head of household position and are simply unable to submit to their husbands. It’s harder to submit to your husband when you’re the bread winner. Lack of trust: Some men want their women to be submissive but they haven’t yet created a strong foundation of trust. Guys, a woman needs to trust your decision making ability and your moral values before she can submit to you. Lack of respect: This is closely related to misuse. Many women feel as if their partner will no longer respect their ideas and contributions if they submit.
There is nothing wrong with being submissive to a trusting, loving husband who understands what submission means but that agreement doesn’t work for every relationship. Many successful relationships function on a 50/50 agreement; both parties are treated as equals and that works for them. Each couple has to find what works best for them. If your wife is not willing to take on a more submissive role, maybe you are not displaying the strong, providing male lead that she needs to feel comfortable or maybe she’s just not the Carolyn Ingalls type.