1. Do not tell me your dog is just like family. Who else in your family licks their butt? 2. Do not tell me you like long walks on the beach. It is sandy and wet and there are few bars on the beach. 3. Do not tell me you want to save the whales. What? Save the whales -collect the whole set? 4. Do no tell me you are going out with your girlfriends. They are friends . What if I said I am going to go out with my boyfriends? 5. I have no strong desire to see any pictures of any kids. . They look like every other kid, wearing a soccer uniform, dressed up for Christmas, putting up two fingers behind someone’s head…. 6. Do not call ten times a day. Do not text 20 times a day. No one has that much to talk about. 7. I do not want to hear about your labor, your divorce or your sisters who do not understand you. 8. You do not need to know where I am all the time. 9. Do not keep track of one month, two month, three month anniversaries. 10. Why do you just have red wine at your house? Doesn’t anyone buy bourbon anymore?
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