Mr. Burns, TV Executive: Fox Threatens ‘Simpsons’ Cancellation

COMMENTARY | Oh Fox Television. We’ve met before; you might know me from such viewership as “The Simpsons.” And now, according to The Daily Beast, you may be canceling a show that’s run so long not only could it legally get a drink, it’s starting to get a little tired of the bar scene.

With the contracts of the people who power the voices of Springfield expiring at the end of the year, apparently negotiations have gotten heated and you, 20th Century Fox, my friend, are demanding that the actors take a 45 percent pay decrease. Otherwise, according to your studio’s statement, you will find yourselves unable to continue to pay to produce new episodes “under the current financial model,” according to USA Today.

We understand, 20th Century Fox, we really do; we’re all strapped these days. The actors – without whom there would be no Springfield, Unknown State, USA – make about $8 million per year. With six principal actors, Dan Castellaneta, Julie Kavner, Nancy Cartwright, Yeardley Smith, Hank Azaria, and Harry Shearer, that means they’re costing you a hefty $48 million per year total. Granted, that’s nothing close to, say, the nearly $111 million per year reportedly paid to the judges of “American Idol,” but it’s still quite a chunk of change. It’s not as though “The Simpsons,” that small, quiet show not known widely around the world, turns much of a profit.

Although something is nagging at me, 20th Century Fox, and I can’t quite put my finger on it. Oh right, now I remember.

Through merchandizing and syndication, “The Simpsons” has raked in “untold billions.” That’s billions. With a “b” and nine zeroes. And that’s “untold,” as in you’re not saying. What we do know, though, according to The Daily Beast, is that the people who have given those characters their un-aging long life are not receiving any of that money.

So the actors, very reasonably, agreed to a 30 percent reduction in salary in exchange for a small cut of the lunchboxes and t-shirts and syndication and talking beer openers — an offer that was rebuffed, reports Reuters. Meanwhile, with 500 episodes available for syndication likely to continue to return profits in the billions for many years, adding new ones probably won’t impact your own bottom line.

So, 20th Century Fox, if you want to cancel “The Simpsons” because it’s worth the same amount of money to you dead or alive, we can’t stop you (can we? Does anyone know? Is there an international convention for this kind of thing?). Over the years, the unique talents of the cast of “The Simpsons” created a place people want to visit, even if they can’t find it on a map. But placing ridiculous, demeaning demands on those same actors and then blaming them for shutting down the town is insulting to them and insulting to the viewers, and leaves us with only one thought: Mr. Burns is real, and he’s running 20th Century Fox.


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