My home is in North Carolina. We are known for our barbecue, southern accents, Wilbur and Orville Wright and also for our hospitality. Historically, NC was one of the thirteen original colonies and it has a rich cotton and tobacco history. We left the union during the Civil War” kicking and screaming”, because most of our people sided with the union and were against slavery. Fortunately, we were allowed back into the union later and we are a state unlike Virginia which is a Commonwealth. Dolley Madison, a native North Carolinian served as a charming hostess in The White House. She would be happy to know that these great qualities that she shared with so many Tarheel women is alive and still going strong.
In North Carolina, it is still acceptable for men to hold the door open for a lady, pull out her chair and in certain areas, to stand when a lady enters a room. It never occured to us to be offended by such chivalry. In fact, some expect it as a right of passage. Southern women are reared to be church-going wives and mothers, but not all of us southern belles choose that life for ourselves. We can indeed be a very curious mixture of old-fashioned and modern women. A lot of us go to college and put off getting married, if we ever get married at all.
The first thing that people should know about southern manners is that it is perfectly acceptable to drop by a friend or relative’s home without calling first. In fact, people seem to get offended when you forget to do it. It is normal to invite strangers into your home for “supper” and into your church. It would be wrong not to show them such kindness. It doesn’t matter where they are from. If you are driving along one of our highways and your car breaks down, don’t worry. Someone will usually stop to help you within ten minutes. If you happen to be a lady, your wait may be as little as five minutes. I once got a flat tire on my way to college and had four people stop to help me within minutes of pulling over my car. I even managed to make it to class on time thanks to their help. Cell phones can be made redundant by such hospitality.
Sometimes we wave to people we do not know. No, we have not lost our minds. It is part and parcel to the type of people that we are. We do it because our parents did it and their parents did it before them. It is like a tradition for us. We do not mean any harm by it, quite the contrary. It means that we are friendly.
Heaven forbid that a neighbor should have a death in their family. In NC, we will bring them food and sympathy. It is also not unusual for families to hold wakes in their homes. We certainly have our fair share of funeral homes, but some of us are more old-fashioned than others. We also have various religious customs.
We like basketball in NC. Luckily, we have some rather talented college teams. Duke University, The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill (UNC), North Carolina State University and Wake Forest University are our top teams and they usually do well every season. We like bragging rights just as much as the next person and we reserve our right to use them. We do have a Professional Hockey Team known as “The Carolina Hurricanes” a game in which some of us are still trying to comprehend- namely me. It is so hot in NC during the summer, a hockey team almost sounds like a bad joke although we do have more than our fair share of hurricanes. The game of hockey is also gaining a following and is becoming popular with many North Carolinians.
In NC, the phrase “Ya’ll” is often used. We are not cursing at you so, please do not get offended. It simply means “you all” and we usually say it slow enough to be heard correctly. Many of us know proper English, but we also know how to break it down.
We have a distinct southern accent which is much different from the ones in the deep south. In fact, it can vary from one part of our state to another. The mountains have their accent and the coast, not one to be left out, also has their version which is very distinct, especially on the outer banks. My Grandpa used to say that he could tell what part of the state someone was from by their accent. He was much better at it than I am, although I can spot a fake southern accent from a mile away. They are very difficult to fake and it takes a long time to learn how to talk like we do. Fortunately, I have learned not to write like I talk.
North Carolina is and will always be a very special place to me. I would not want to live anywhere else in the world. If the prospect of kindness, good food and hospitality appeal to you, we welcome you. Our renowned hospitality is always in season.