From the moment our children are born, we watch them grow and develop with a keen eye on their strengths and weaknesses. It is often these strengths and weaknesses that form who they are and what they will become in life. With four children I have had the pleasure of watching for unique individual development onto a path that clearly leads them in the direction of future careers. Sometimes, however, a child expresses interest in a career path that makes no sense based upon what a parent knows about their child. When your child chooses the wrong career path, should you talk them out of it?
Recognizing a Faltering Career Path
My middle daughter is the most caring person in the world. Children naturally flock to her and she loves the world of science and exploration. She wants to be first-grade teacher who focuses on science in case she chooses to switch to middle school later on.
My youngest children are fraternal boy/girl twins. My son is detailed oriented and loves building with Legos and other building materials. It’s nothing for him to draw a new Lego creation and then skip back to his room to turn that plan into a real life Lego creation. He wants to be an architect.
My youngest daughter, however, is all about athletics. She wants to play every sport, aside from cheerleading and she excels at most sports. Right now her career path includes playing sports in college and trying to make her way into the WNBA. A long shot, yes, but a realistic goal for an 8-year-old none-the-less.
Then comes my oldest daughter. At 14 years old, she is attending a special high school/college. She’ll be spending five years in high school and graduating with enough credits for an Associate’s degree in Arts or Science upon completion. Recently I was asked to attend a meeting to outline her educational path and I was astounded at the results of the meeting.
When asked where she saw herself at 28 years old, she said still in school to be a nurse, psychiatrist or neurologist. First of all, those are three completely different career paths, but at least they are all in the same medical realm of expertise. However, at 28 years old, she would have already completed her education for two of her top three job choices. It’s also important to note that she doesn’t like science or math, she has no idea what a residency is and she thinks a neurologist studies the mind (not the physical brain but the mind.)
How to Talk Your Child Out of a Career Decision
After the meeting, I talked with my daughter about the detailed educational paths for each of her top three choices. She was awed by the fact that a neurologist studies the brain and not the mind. Then, she realized she was talking about a psychologist and not a psychiatrist. The path she wanted to choose was an Associate of Arts not an Associate of Science. She decided to change her career path based on the new information we’d talked about.
Sometimes our children are so blinded by what they think they know that they cannot see the reality of the situation. Talking with your children about the realities of their career paths may be more important than many parents realize. For my daughter it meant the difference in completing two years of science-heavy, math-heavy education that she didn’t need and completing an education based in the social sciences she would use in the career she really wanted.
More from Summer on Parenting
Dealing with a Teen that Pushes Your Buttons
10 Community Service Ideas for High School Students
How to Balance Life and an Early College High School Student