Looking at the title I know there are several parents out there saying, “what do you mean to pay or not to pay?” Well calm down and let me explain. Of course everyone should do their part in taking care of their children, but in some cases I feel there should be an exception to the rule. I’m a strong advocate for child support being the parent of four children myself. I ask this question out of curiosity because I truly believe the child support system could use a major over haul. I know some will agree with what I have to say and then others will be completely outraged. So here goes.
If an absent parent (AP) is having their child support (CS) payments regularly taken from their wages, never pays late, and is not in arrears, should they be made to pay those same payments during the extended periods of time the child or children are in the AP’s home? Let me give you an example. A mother has full custody of the children and the children spend their summers with their dad. Should those payments continue to be paid to the mother although the dad has the kids?
I pose this question because the courts are adamant about these very same children receiving their support payments while with the custodial parent, but no one ensures they receive the same amount of support while with the absent parent. It seems a little unfair to continue to send payments into a household and the kids aren’t even there. So what exactly are the kids supposed to do when half of the income that’s being taken from the parent they’re currently with is going into another household for the next eight to ten weeks?
It’s sad to say, but a lot of children never even benefit from the money being collected for them. I know personally several situations where child support money is being used to fund weekend trips and lavish shopping sprees. In some cases the kids are old enough to know that they are not receiving what is rightfully theirs because it’s being spent on non-essential things like $200 shoes and purses. Yes, I’m sure there’s a mother out there saying I deserve to buy what ever it is I want because I take care of these kids all year long. Well maybe you do, but when your kids are calling their dad saying we don’t have anything to eat because there’s no food in the house, then there’s a problem. I also know there are mom’s doing the best they can trying to live within their means while taking care of their children, but may fall a little short, maybe because they missed a few days of work due to illness, or because the utilities were higher than normal or something like that.
Keep in mind, I am aware that father’s are custodial parents as well, I simply used this example for this article. Kudos, to you full time dads!
I guess the point I’m trying to make is, is it fair to hold a parent responsible for child support during extended periods of in home visitation with their children? At the end of the day, the children are supposed to be the main focus, so wouldn’t it make sense to send the money with them?