When Does a Spanking Become a Beating?

As a parent and foster parent I was appalled at the recent video showing a judge beating his then 16 year old daughter. While I believe there is a time and a place (the bottom) for a spanking, I don’t believe that a “utensil” such as a belt, wooden spoon, hair brush, leather strap etc. should be used. It’s too easy to lose control and not realize the damage inflicted upon the person being spanked.

According to the Yahoo Reference Dictionary a Spanking is: “A number of slaps on the buttocks delivered in rapid succession, as for punishment.”

When Does a Spanking Become a Beating?

When does a spanking cross the line? Many believe that the moment an object is used to spank the child it has crossed the line. When the child has bruises from the spanking it has crossed the line. No child should have bruises from a spanking.

Does Hillary Adams Video Change Society’s View of Spanking?

Will the video Hillary Adams posted of her father beating her change society’s view on child abuse? Hillary was very courageous to show this video. Did she know the statue of limitations had run out? Possibly.

Will the video empower other abused children to video tape or find a way to record what’s happening to them? So often children don’t get a voice in the court system. So many children are sent back to abusive homes and found dead days, weeks or months later when it could have been prevented.

I personally am glad to see that Hillary had the courage to post this video. Not to be hurtful to her father, but to show these young children who have been abused that they are not alone, and that these children should have a voice.

At What Age is a Child Old Enough to be Spanked?

I once knew a woman who bragged about having spanked her child when she was only 6 weeks old. The child was now a thriving 6 year old. I was shocked that she would believe a 6 week old infant could understand why he or she was being spanked.

Many cultures believe that a child should be at least 2 years of age before they are spanked. Still others vary between 1 and 2 years of age. When a child can turn and smile and still do what you just told them not to do and know they’ve done wrong, then most people feel they are old enough for a quick swat on the bottom that grabs their attention and tells them the behavior was wrong.

At What Age Should a Child Not Be Spanked?

At what age is a child too old to be spanked? I’ve known parents that stopped spanking their children at around age 9. On the flip side, I’ve known parents that still believed in spanking when the child was in their late teens. Should teens be spanked? If your teen were spanked by a teacher would you consider that assault? Should the teen consider it assault if the parent spanks them? What if a group of bullies grabbed your teen and gave him or her a spanking? Would it be abuse then?

Does The Church Play a Role?

Most churches believe in the verse Proverbs 13: 24 “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.” Many of these churches however, differ on whether the rod should be used to spank the child or to draw them back into the fold of love as in Psalm 23:4 “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” Throughout the Bible the shepherds use the rod to draw a wayward lamb back into the fold, not to beat the lamb with it.

Tennessee pastor Michael Pearl has written a book called Train Up a Child. In his book instructions are given on how to use a switch for hitting children. Some of these children are as young as six months old. He goes on to tell parents how to use other “implements” such as a “quarter-inch flexible plumbing line” on older children. He also states that “older children should be hit with a belt, wooden spoon or willow switch hard enough to sting.”

Many parents are working to try to ban the sale of this book and have it removed from shelves citing that it advocates child abuse.

Does Hitting Beget Hitting?

The controversial statement many use is that hitting begets hitting. If a child is hit many believe that that child may grow up to become an abuser. Are there reasons not to hit a child? Are there better methods to discipline a child?

Society’s rules have changed. What was once considered acceptable is no longer the norm when it comes to spanking. Many of our parents endured abuse and still see it as stern discipline. New methods not involving hitting are being used to discipline children. Will these newer methods work? Only time will tell.

Sources:

http://www.wusa9.com/news/article/173304/283/SHOCKING-VIDEO-Judge-Cleared-After-Beating-Daughter

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/pastor-corporal-punishment-advice-scrutinized-child-deaths-160004793.html


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