Staying home on the weekends and sitting in front of the ol’ boob tube isn’t always an unexciting or bad thing this time of year. You got College football! The jammed packed college stadiums with school colors that swathe the unhopeful season of any bowl championship game at the end of 14 weeks. Any team thinks they got the chance of undefeated expectations every year. You got this all day, every Saturday and some time Friday nights (being home Friday night with nothing to do but watch division II teams have at it is actually pretty depressing… let’s stick to Saturdays).
Unless early in the morning, you attend church, sitting in the pews praising God to give the Lions a break and finally start a run for the playoffs, you sleep in; wake up, make some eggs, and turn on the tube to view what game starts first. What game is going to be blessed with the ‘A’ team (Troy Aikman and Joe Buck) on FOX? What game are you going to extend your sleeping in, with Phil Simms on CBS? The AFC is a great conference, but putting your viewers to sleep with someone commentating with already too many concussions brings me and the other viewers to the competition (FOX, or even Nickelodeon to see if a Sponge Bob marathon is on). I want to stay awake while pouring my chips into my queso dip. Let’s not start on the pre-game show…
Shannon Sharp… well… I will save you the time and the thinking that is already floating in your heads as regards to “what the heck is he even saying?”
But don’t back track baby. Go ahead and spit it out Shannon, because we all love the awkward predictions and jokes you try to pull on live TV. Loved your Hall-of-fame speech, but I don’t like to be preached upon. Just give us the thank you for the support speech in ten minute and then wrap it up. Everyone grows up having a tough life. I don’t understand who tells the players to go up there on the stage and tell the people how life was hard and how buying your mom a house when you make it big is a life goal. It’s every mom’s responsibility to raise a child and put the child first before anything else in life. Now I’m just saying, but if I was a mother of say… Deon Sanders… I wouldn’t mind a bigger house from him when I get older. But I would want to make sure my son doesn’t grow up to be a pompous wiener.
Zipping that conversation to an end, time to describe why the kickoff return has added extra conflict to the game. But in a great way, giving the special teams coaches more TV time and a reason to call a game plan.
During every game this year a stat sheet will pop up on your screen. It will compare last year’s touchbacks to the touchbacks this year. But who really cares or gives a freak? A lot of people do and they also think the NFL is turning into a soft league. That the league will take the kickoff away eventually and maybe they will. But for now it is perfect and here is the first reason; Momentous starting speed. The receiver of the kick will now have an extra 8 or 9 yards from (guessing from the usual spot of reception now). Every special teams coach is telling the returners to take a knee. But don’t, take the ball out. The returners are always the fastest guy on the team (well at least they are on my Madden game when I edit the depth chart). Once the guy hits the 10 yard line, you will see defenders on the TV screen. But by that time the runner will have full momentum. One or two blocks and the runner will hit a whole for 40 or 50 more yards, even a touchdown.
After watching the Packers-Saints game, there were two returns. One for a record tying touchdown return and right after that return, another one for 60-70 yards with only one more person to beat. If you let your returners do what they are good at they can make you happy and we will have many record tying returns all year long.
Second; a pooch kick to the red zone.
Just a soft well hung (LOL!!) kick keeping it out of the end zone. When the returner grabs the ball and looks ahead knowing that he has to move forward for a return, the defending team will be in his face. That’s an average of 10 yards per return, only if the defending team can tackle. How exciting right? Just when I never wanted to miss an opening kickoff in my life!
There isn’t a third reason. Just stop talking and watch as we have a record season for kick-off returns.