The evening described took place this past spring and well before the primaries got into high gear. The circumstances that led Dr. Paul’s staff to give me the access I had, all be it briefly, to their man are truly remarkable, yet likely not unusual amongst younger men on the road, away from home. My goal that evening was not to surpass the great Sasha Cohen in “punking” the Congressman. However, the opportunity was to good to pass up. Never in my wildest thoughts did I imagine I would actually get the Mittternative himself into a strip club or a gay bar or into a fight in an Irish Pub for that matter. But I did. I set this task upon myself not in any way to achieve notoriety or public gain. I did it solely for my own amusement. I fully intended to remain silent about these events. I have reversed my policy on this affair because, much to my surprise, Ron Paul has achieved in the Republican primaries something he has utterly failed at doing for over 30 years in Congress: he has persuaded a good number of people to take him seriously.
I had heard on an AM station that Paul would be speaking at the Holiday Inn on Rt. 7 that evening and having determined I had nothing better to do I decided to hear what the Representative from Texas had to say. Upon arriving at the hotel, minutes after Ron Paul started speaking, I found myself distinctly unmotivated to listen to a political speech. I decided to have a glass of beer and something to eat at the hotel bar. I took a seat at the bar adjacent to a couple of younger fellows with Ron Paul buttons attached to the breast pockets of their button down shirts. After ordering a bottle of domestic brew and a plate of hot wings, I asked the Paul supporters why they were not listening to the speech going on in the Grand Ballroom. Their reply was that they had heard it several times already and actually worked for the Congressman. At this I exclaimed I was a great admirer of their boss, was very active locally and a big TP supporter (this last is true in so far as I firmly believe the role toilet paper has played in building a better way of life is usually understated). I mentioned that it was my intention to see the Congressman and had dedication to my job not brought about the necessity of skipping lunch I would be doing so at that moment.
As I consumed my fare, I mentioned to the Paul workers the alleged hot wings were actually as bland as Mitt Romney. By their responses, I knew I had earned the trust and friendship of both young men. It was at this point they confided in me that they had a dilemma. It seems they had met a couple of young ladies who were determined to party with the boys from the campaign. Unfortunately, they were responsible for the good Doctor after the speech. I then offered to take over the responsibility and expose Ron Paul to some local flavor. Much to my dismay they took me up on the offer with the condition that I return the Doctor at a reasonable hour since they had a plane to catch in the morning.
The speech was just wrapping up as the three of us entered the Grand Ballroom. All 30 listeners were on their feet approximating thunderous applause as best they could. I was assured that come August, in Iowa, they would have 300 people at a venue like this. After a brief Q&A session the congressman glad handed his way through the crowd. I was then introduced to him as a local Tea Party activist who would show him some of the local sights before he turned in. He introduced himself as Ron, so turning on my most obsequious smile and putting all the ardor I could muster into it I mentioned that my car was just outside.
As we walked through the parking lot Ron asked if I was affiliated with any of the national Tea Party organizations. I replied only as a potential donor but that many activists are working locally to oppose Agenda 21. The congressman gave a satisfied grunt in response. I mentioned that even though we had a new Republican Governor in this state, a lot of sustainable development was going on. Paul seemed to loosen up a little at this and advised me the UN is currently working to develop an Agenda 21 for cultures. I gave a shocked gasp at this as we reached my car.
As we drove to our first destination I told Ron Paul one of the easiest ways for all levels of government to trim some expense was to end the “War on Drugs”. With a knowing chuckle he replied, “It’ll never happen with liberals in charge. They like the power too much and it gives them an excuse to spend other peoples money on police unions.” I pointed out that the war had started under Reagan. In a grave tone he informed me “While their was much to admire about his presidency, Ronald Reagan was very much a big government conservative. Realistically, our debt problems started with his military build up and failure to cut spending and taxes.” I remarked that saying so in a Republican primary would be suicidal. He laughed “People are ready for new ideas.”
I had assumed all along that pulling into the parking lot of the Cloud 9 Lounge would be the culmination of the evenings hijinx but Congressman Paul seemed unfazed by the lack of windows and giant sign proclaiming “24 DANCERS”. Being that I had personal business inside we proceeded to enter.
“God Almighty!” the congressman exclaimed as we entered, “You would bring me to a place like this!” I assured him that what happens at Cloud 9 stays at Cloud 9. Not having mollified the Rep from Texas I agreed that we would limit ourselves to 1 drink while I took care of a personal matter (I had parlayed wins by the Red Wings, Islanders and Blues into a tidy sum for myself the night before. Information I did not feel obliged to share with my guest.) with the bartender. As we bellied up to the bar I inquired as to the Doctors choice of poison. He replied “I’m a Southern Baptist.” So it was a bottled domestic for me and ginger ale for Ron. I explained to my honored guest I had some business at the end of the bar and would return shortly.
Upon my return, I noticed the congressman seemed to have taken quite an interest in our “entertainer”. As she approximated a stirrup like position, I was informed “I’m an OB/GYN and I’ve seen enough of this. It’s why I got into politics.” I replied that if they all looked like her his field would have been much more crowded. “Supply and demand would sort it out eventually.” was his answer. I expressed my understanding that a true Austrian does not believe in supply and demand. In a condescending tone, I was informed that “Austrians believe in supply and demand, they just believe that people, especially those who are not used to spending money, can not be relied upon to make logical decisions when either one deviates from expectations. Especially when the supply of money exceeds demand for it. That’s why we need to end the Fed and get back to a gold standard. Eliminate deviations in the market.” Since my money supply has never exceeded my demand for it I asked the congressman if he had made any bad decisions because he had an excess of funds. I was sharply advised that since my personal business was concluded we no longer had a reason to stay.
While walking to my car I asked the congressman if that was why we should return to the gold standard? Limit the money supply so people will use it wisely? “That would be one of the many reasons.” he replied. “It would also free us from being forced into government dependency. If investors knew their money was backed by gold they would be less likely to tolerate government intrusion in their business. The government would be less likely to intrude since businessmen could just pull out their gold and use it to purchase goods or services and collapse the government. A guaranteed and stable money supply would end inflation as well.”
As we started the drive to our next destination, I asked “Why gold?” “Why not? It has been shown to have value in every civilization in history. You can not find one instance of people not having faith that gold would buy them the things they need.” he answered. There seemed no point in me pointing out that faith is as much necessary for gold as it is for folding money. I then commented “I know you are against the government creating wealth out of ink. Do you intend to do away with fractional reserve requirements for private wealth creators?” At this question I received a suspicious look. “I would like to end all government requirements from the private sector. If people in the market are fools enough to take or make loans without adequate collateral I don’t see why it should be the government’s problem.”
During the drive to our next stop I congratulated the congressman on his son’s recent election to the Senate. He beamed proudly, “It’s the American dream that a father can share his legacy with his children. I’m not getting any younger either. It is a comfort to know that no matter what happens someone will carry on the fight for liberty.” I then inquired as to the status of the fence along the southern border in Texas. He replied that “At least Rick Perry got that much right and isn’t wasting our taxes on it in Texas. I wish people would realize we need the cheap labor stream the border provides. What we really need is a way to get them to go home when the work is done.” I then mentioned, jokingly, that I thought the fence was a bad idea since it would not only keep Mexicans out, it would keep Americans in. Ron then acknowledged I had a point and he hadn’t looked at it that way before.
I sincerely figured that pulling up at the Caliente Salchicha Inn would mean the end of my amusement this evening. The extreme lighting and bars on the outside of the windows in an otherwise upscale shopping center didn’t seem to mean anything to him. Ron did inquire as to whether this was a “Spanish” place. I assured him we were unlikely to meet any Spaniards here.
As we entered and made our way to the bar, we were greeted by a gentleman wearing an ascot tucked into a bright Hawaiian shirt who introduced himself as Big Al and asked if it was our first trip to the Salchicha. I nodded in the affirmative while Ron proclaimed to be from out of town. Al then let us know that May – December relationships warmed his heart and gave him hope for his future. I stared straight ahead thinking Sasha Cohen would eat his heart out at this. Ron gave him a polite thank you and we continued on to the bar.
Continued in “Out Drinking with Ron Paul (Part 2)