Well, the Shoe Emporium at the mall will never be the same!! I’m just glad the clerks and manager in the store have such patience. Poor Aunt Irma had a cramp in her foot by the time we got to the store. She insisted on going up and down every aisle until she found just the right three pairs. We found a seat, and the clerk was happy to help her try them on. Unfortunately, the toes on her cramped foot were curled up, so it was a bit of a struggle to get the shoe off her foot. The poor clerk tugged and pulled until she was red in the face. Finally, we got her to relax her toes and when we did, that shoe popped right off and the unprepared clerk went right over backwards off her stool; shoe in hand and eyes big as saucers. One of the customers had to jump over her to avoid tripping.
It seemed like it took forever, but after trying each pair on three times, Aunt Irma finally opted for the slouch booties that we’d seen when we first came. She also saw a pair of cross-trainers that she liked,and decided she wanted to try those on too. Those were the ones she decided to wear out of the shoe store to give her feet a rest. Unfortunately, she forgot the front of them was cut at an angle, and as we were waiting in line at the Twisted Pretzel, she leaned a bit too far forward and lost her balance. It was too late for her to catch herself. She just sort of tucked and rolled across the food court and right into a couple of guys one their lunch breaks. It was a strike; both of them went down and it rained curly fries, chicken strips and cole slaw all over the place.
Aunt Irma and I went through every shop on that mezzanine. We were laden down with packages and feeling pretty good about the bargains we’d found. After our earlier mishap on the escalator, we decided the elevator would probably be a little safer. Oh, Aunt Irma! She stepped forward a bit too soon. The doors weren’t open yet so she ran right into them and all her packages went everywhere. A nice young man helped us pick them up and then held the elevator door for us too. Unfortunately, he let go a split second too soon and poor Aunt Irma got stuck between the doors, one foot in and one foot out of the elevator.
She dropped a package outside the doors. As she bent to pick it up, the doors hit her-one in the shoulder and one in the rear. That made her bag fall off her shoulder. She tossed the package into the elevator. That nice young man tried to hold the doors open again so she could get her bag, but he tripped over the package and Aunt Irma. Now they were both lying side by side in the elevator doorway. The doors kept going open and shut, open and shut. He finally managed to pick himself up. He grabbed Aunt Irma’s bag and then he grabbed Aunt Irma by the ankles and pulled her into the elevator.
It took us a minute to get her up off the floor and steadied on her feet, but we managed to pull ourselves together by the time the elevator reached the bottom floor. That young man must have really been in a hurry to get somewhere. He jumped off that elevator and ran lickety-split through the mall when the doors opened up. We had to stop a couple of times and pick up a dropped package or two on the way back to the parking lot. Once, I accidentally grabbed some of Aunt Irma’s hair and her wig started to come off. We had to stop and adjust that; but we finally had the packages in the trunk and were on our way home.