I have just experienced another “ah ha” moment with my teenage son. As if starting high school and having his first date wasn’t enough, Matthew is now driving! After getting his driver’s permit in November, he decided to try for a hardship license that would allow him to drive to and from school. Since he has to be at school an hour later than I have to be at work, it did sound like a good idea. That was until it actually happened!
I’m one of those moms who finds it tough to let go. It seems like my son has gone from a toddler to a teenager in a matter of minutes. I swear it was only yesterday that he was playing with Hot Wheels, and today he wants to drive a car with real wheels. Being the ever-devoted mom, I enrolled my son in driving school and completed all the required practice hours with him. When the day finally came for him to take the actual test, he was as cool as a cucumber. I was a nervous wreck!
After only a few minutes in the car with the instructor, Matthew drove back up. I thought he must have been unsuccessful since the test had been so quick. Was I ever wrong! The instructor said Matthew was one of the best teenage drivers she had seen and happily gave him his hardship license.
Now, there is definitely something life changing about watching your child back out of the driveway for the first time by himself. All I could think of was that this is the beginning of him needing me even less. As I watched this confident, responsible young man drive away, the tears started. This year has been full of so many milestones, and I know there will be even more as we navigate the rest of high school.
Sometimes, I wish so badly that time would slow down. I love being a mom and enjoy every “first” with Matthew. I just with those “firsts” wouldn’t come along so quickly. When I first became a parent, people told me that the years would start flying by. I didn’t understand at the time, but now I do. Those toddler years seem like they passed in a blur. Once school started, there were activities, homework, play dates, etc. The days were always full and began to pass quicker. By junior high, Matthew was developing more independence and needing my help less and less. Now that he’s entered high school he’s REALLY independent. I can no longer help him with a lot of his homework, and he seems to be busy all the time.
There is a fine line between loving our children and smothering them. Right now, I’d almost prefer the smothering (not literally, of course). I’d just like to wrap Matthew up, hold him, and stop the clock for a little while. We all want our children to grow up into kind, responsible adults. I just wish it wasn’t happening so quickly.
When I think of the new world that has opened by my son driving, it really is amazing. He has gone from a little boy to a fine young man very quickly. As he reminds me, I let him fly a plane so driving should be no big deal. It will probably take until he watches his own child drive away until he realizes what huge deal it truly is.
For those of you with children still young enough to enjoy Hot Wheels and toy trucks, enjoy every moment of that glorious time. Before you know it, you’ll be watching your baby drive away in a real car. The years of childhood are so very short. Don’t rush them along, just slow down and savor them. Maybe for fun I’ll get down the Hot Wheels from the attic this weekend. I’m sure Matthew will be thrilled to play with them for a while!