Too often we get caught up in the craziness of our day to day lives, and lose sight of the relationships that matter most. Many times, we only realize a relationship is in trouble when we are well past the point of a simple correction, and where more serious and concerted efforts are required. Utilizing one or more of the suggestions in this article will provide a good start for resolving conflict in repairing your relationship issues.
Proactive Communication. We often fail to communicate with people we spend a lot of time around, especially our loved ones. To keep relationships positive and growing, you need to keep an open and proactive line of communication. Make sure that you tell your spouse your feelings, and remember to listen to their feelings, both verbalized and expressed through body language. At the first sign of realizing there is an actual or potential rift in your relationship, it is best for you to set aside quiet time with your significant other, clear the air and reestablish the lines of communication that will allow your relationship to move forward, resolve issues and remain solid.
Seek out the Root Causes of Your Conflicts. If you find yourself in a situation where you in your spouse are constantly arguing, bickering, or otherwise in a cycle of negative in accusatory argument, step back and realize that the pettiness of the fighting will not resolve the underlying issues. Take some time to allow each of you to have some privacy to reflect the underlying causes of your anxiety, anger or concern. Sometimes, you will find that one or both of you are more interested in “winning” an argument, without even realizing what you are arguing about. Once you understand the root cause of your disagreements, you will be able to address the resolution of those issues in a calm and productive manner. Sometimes this will require the use of a third-party to help you resolve these issues.
Respect Your Partner and Yourself. Rather than playing the blame game, and finding fault in your spouse, remember that it is easier to tear someone down then build them up. You will often find that finger-pointing is a cyclical style of argument, and will continue until either you or your partner walk away. If you find yourself in a position where a discussion is dissolving into a blame session, have enough respect for yourself and your spouse to calm down or pause your conversation until both of you can be productive in finding solutions.
Actively Appreciate Each Other. Take some time in your relationship to let your spouse know the reasons you appreciate them, and do this on a regular basis. Showing appreciation can be done with words or small gestures, so long as they are sincere. You will find that taking the first step in showing your appreciation for your loved ones will open a door for them to show their appreciation for you.
Look To a Professional. If you find that you and your significant other are unable to work through the resolution of issues in your relationship, seek the help of a trained professional. Professionals could include a mutually respected member of your church, a therapist, or another trusted individual who can provide independent advice about your relationship.