Stores are well-stocked with school supplies as the new school year is upon us. What do you do when your child has her heart set on a particular teacher and is assigned a different one? Read on for tips on how to handle the disappointment.
Keep an open mind. Teach your children to have an open mind about the assigned teacher, instead of allowing the disappointment to completely define the start of the year as they go back to school. You never know, this might just be a great fit for your child and the teacher, and possibly even a better one!
Hide your own disappointment. Children feed off of our reactions. Even if you as a parent are disappointed about a teacher assignment, be careful this is not apparent to your child. Encourage your child by reassuring him that he is off to the start of a great school year.
Talk to your children early . One of the mistakes that I made with my youngest child was not explaining to her how the process works early on. She had her heart set on a teacher that her older brother had, and was certain she would be assigned to the same teacher. During the two years leading up to her being in that grade, she often mentioned how much she wanted to be in this teacher’s class. The teacher often told her she hoped she was in her class. What I failed to do was explain to my daughter that the assignments were made by administration and not on the request of teachers or parents. She automatically assumed that since the teacher “wanted” her in the class, that she would be assigned the class. I take 100% of the blame on that one. I should have realized this and explained how it worked which would have helped with the disappointment when she was not assigned to her class. She felt disappointed, sad and that she was not wanted by the teacher until I explained the process to her. By the way, she was assigned a teacher that she loves just as much and thrived in the class!
Meet the teachers. Another revelation I had in hindsight was how valuable it would have been for me to introduce my daughter to other teachers in that grade level prior to the school year. Our school is filled with wonderful teachers, and I bet yours is too! It would be helpful for your child to realize that there are other wonderful teachers in the event they are not assigned the teacher they think they want.
Form your own opinions. Ok, so what if you “and” your child wanted a particular teacher, which she did not get, PLUS she was assigned a teacher that you did not want? Well first, remember that we are all different and so are our children. We all have different personalities and learning styles. I have learned in my own experience that our very best school year was with a teacher that I had been warned we would not like. It turned out to be an absolutely wonderful year for my child and the teacher became a good friend. Granted, she gave positive as well as negative feedback to me throughout the year, but she did it to help my son and not in a critical way. It is important that parents keep the right perspective when receiving information and remember it is not meant to be critical or demeaning but should be taken to determine ways to improve.
Be Positive! Remind your child that we are all different and to have a positive outlook about his relationship with his new teacher. Remember most people do not meet our expectations 100% because we are not “perfect people”. Teachers are trained professionals and for all you know, this might be your child’s best year ever as they head back to school.