Those who suffer from chronic pain know how debilitating it can be to suffer from constant pain. It’s easy to forget how much pain affects life when one is not feeling pain, but it’s nearly impossible to think of anything but the pain when feeling it. While those who suffer from chronic pain are likely to explore pharmacological and medical help with the pain, that help isn’t always enough and the side effects of traditional pain management can be problematic.
Alternative and complementary therapies have been shown to offer help in managing chronic pain. For example, playing video games, in one research study, proved to help some people manage chronic or severe pain without medication. Meditation and massage therapy, acupuncture and other alternative health therapies can all help assist with managing chronic pain.
But there is nothing that helps chronic pain sufferers more than when friends and family respond to the pain appropriately. If you are a family member or friend of someone who suffers from one of the myriad of ‘invisible illnesses’, particularly those that cause chronic pain, here are ten tips that can help you help your loved one manage their pain.
10. Listen:
People who suffer from chronic pain need to talk about their illness. Unfortunately, friends and family members who are close often have heard the same complaints over and over. Surprisingly, many chronic pain sufferers find the pain is more manageable when they can talk about it. When someone with chronic pain is complaining about their pain-yet again-take a moment to listen to them. It makes a difference.
9. Ask questions:
One way to know how to help someone who suffers from chronic pain is to ask questions-that is, ask the person what they need.
8. Avoid clichés and platitudes:
One of the things many who suffer from chronic pain have expressed is frustration at people who offer well-intentioned encouragement by saying, “I know how you feel….” and then telling a story about a time they experienced pain. Instead of saying you understand-because no one can truly understand another’s pain-simply let your friend of loved one know you are there, available, willing to listen.
7. Offer to run easy errands:
Getting dressed can be a trigger for a chronic pain sufferer, and going out and picking up groceries or running to the post office takes more effort from someone with chronic pain than it does someone without. If you’re running to the store, offer to pick things up for someone who suffers from chronic pain. The little things like this can make a big difference in the quality of a chronic pain sufferer’s day.
6. Don’t offer treatment advice:
It’s a given that someone who suffers from chronic pain and has been going to their doctor for that pain probably knows about any and all treatments available. It’s not unusual for someone who suffers from chronic pain to get well-intentioned friends and family members offering them advice on how to treat, cure or prevent their pain.
Alternative therapies, supplements, holistic healing and all the complementary and scientific treatments are all great, but it can be very discouraging to someone who suffers with chronic pain to constantly try things that don’t work or might even cause more problems, but they feel they have to try out of obligation to the friend or family member who cares. Try not to dictate treatment to a chronic pain sufferer, but simply listen to them. If they want to know about a treatment, they’ll ask.
5. Cook a meal or two:
Making a casserole that someone can heat up easily in the oven or microwave, or offering to cook a meal or two for someone who suffers from chronic pain, can help with quality of the day. Ask first, whether it would be okay and ensure there are no dietary restrictions, but a nice home-cooked meal that a chronic pain sufferer doesn’t have to cook can be a very welcome assistance.
4. Offer to help clean house:
Daily chores and household tasks can fall behind when someone suffers from chronic pain, not to mention the little things that need to be done like cleaning a toilet, washing dishes, vacuuming and the like. These things can trigger pain episodes in many, so offering a little unobtrusive assistance can help a chronic pain sufferer keep up with chores without triggering more pain and fatigue.
3. Give massage gift certificates:
Massage can help loosen muscles and relax, two things that might help someone who suffers from chronic pain feel better. Make sure the sufferer is medically able to receive a massage, but if they are, schedule it and purchase a gift certificate or pre-paid massage. You can also offer to give the chronic pain sufferer a ride to the massage or schedule it to happen in their home.
2. Babysit, take the kids to the park, walk the dogs:
If the chronic pain sufferer has children or pets, offer to help out for a few hours per week. Taking care of responsibilities can be tiring and can trigger pain, and a short break from those who depend up on the chronic pain sufferer might give him or her time to relax and recuperate.
1. Offer to go to doctor’s appointments:
Sometimes, dealing with doctors who don’t understand or recognize the effects of chronic pain can be difficult for someone who suffers from it. Having an advocate or friend with them in the doctor’s office can make a difference, when more than one person can attest to the changes in the quality of life of the patient.
These are just some simple tips on how to assist someone who suffers from chronic pain to hopefully alleviate or at least lessen the pain or allow the sufferer to rest for a time. Short respite care from a loved one can make a world of difference in the day of someone who suffers from chronic pain. You can make that difference in small ways that will be huge to the person suffering from chronic pain.