Everyone knows about the Der Dutchman. The Big Bass Brothers gave it their legendary “5 Belly” rating. The place is practically a Columbus institution. Which is why I can’t figure out why they decided to put it 7 billion miles outside of the city. OK, seriously, it’s not that far. It is a hike getting there but definitely worth it.
The restaurant is cavernous, with a dining room that puts the biggest Bob Evan’s to shame. Even with the large seating capacity, you should head up there expecting a wait. This isn’t so bad, because the restaurant is attached to an equally impressive bakery. Only complaint here – no free samples.
Now, on to the breakdown.
Juror # 12
I was starving by the time we arrived at the Der Dutchman. Unfortunately, after the 45 minute drive, there was an additional 15 minutes spent walking up to the front entrance; the place is that massive. The waiting area reminded me of a retirement home, partially because of the soft green carpet and abundance of sofas and partially because of the abundance of elderly people.
The bakery was an impressive diversion while we waited and it gave us a chance to contemplate dessert. I wish they would have had a few free samples, because this would have saved me a wasted order at the end of my meal.
Neglecting to order the buffet, I went with a roast beef sandwich and the impressive looking salad bar. The salad bar was nearly as intense as the buffet line, crammed with side dishes like pasta salad, potato salad and cole slaw. I tried to sample as many as I could fit on my plate, but nothing was memorable.
The roast beef sandwich was the high point. Expecting cold cuts, the server instead brought a heaping plate of pot roast style beef with aged cheddar cheese melted on top. I was free to assemble my sandwich to my liking on a warm, buttery roll with a generous selection of tomatoes, pickles and other toppings. This is my favorite roast beef sandwich to date – well done.
Unfortunately, unable to sample the pie first, I was suckered into ordering the seasonal pie. It was grape pie. In retrospect I don’t understand why I even ordered it. But it was awful — God awful. The worst pie I’ve ever had.
Verdict: 6/8 PJs
Definitely would’ve been a 7 or 8 had I tried any other pie.
Juror # 11
The Der Dutchman was the busiest place we have been to date. The dining room is huge and we still had to wait fifteen minutes for a seat. The wait isn’t so bad there because they have a bakery and gift shop that is better than sitting in a room staring at a wall waiting (although it does not have any gifts I would buy). The service was very fast, if not all that personal. I ordered country-fried steak with mashed potatoes and stuffing on the side. Also, for dessert, I had a slice of chocolate peanut butter cream pie.
The meal came out, and it looked fantastic. The entire plate was covered in pepper gravy, and you could tell everything was made from scratch. The mashed potatoes were smooth and buttery. The stuffing was arguably better then my mom’s at Thanksgiving. The gravy was excellent, but I don’t really know a time when gravy was anything less than excellent. The steak was tenderized well and the breading was good. Plus, there wasn’t too much breading, which is something I feel ruins many a good country-fried steak.
If you love cream pies, like I do, Der Dutchman is probably heaven. They have seven or eight different kinds, all served on their deliciously flaky homemade pie crusts with whipped cream made fresh in house.
The only problems with the restaurant were the drive out there and the price of the meal (about sixteen dollars, which is a little more then we usually try to spend on lunch). This meal ranks with the Creole Kitchen as the best I have had since we’ve started this site.
Verdict: 8/8 PJs
This was as good as it gets, and it wasn’t in a neighborhood that terrified me.