The Fargo-Moorhead Walking Trail

Yahoo Contributor Network recently had an assignment up for grabs concerning hiking trails in (my) area. I toyed with the idea of accepting the assignment and even came this close to doing it, but always thought better of it because all my hiking trails are submerged.

This is flat country. We don’t have many hiking trails here, except along the Red River, and those are more strolling trails, not at all taxing or strenuous like a true hiking trail. I think there’s a 15 foot elevation change over by the 12th Avenue North Bridge, right next to that place they built for the St Bernard to rest and recover.

Otherwise, it’s pretty dang flat and it’s been tarred, too. There are many, many Norwegians up here and we tend to be sensible about things. If we enjoy walking, it doesn’t always follow that we like to break a sweat while we’re doing it, and if we need to carry pitons to help us climb a hill, it’s easier just to go around. Walking is supposed to be leisurely, like getting to the point or telling the entire joke.

I knew a guy once who liked to drive out to Colorado and climb those hills, then come back to Fargo and show us his brand new stitches, over and over again, while he fought to remember if he’d suffered a concussion on one of them falls he took. We’d sign his cast and then shoo him back home to talk to his dogs. It’s been years since anyone took a call from him after dark.

The walking trail we have here goes from way down south in Fargo to way up north in Fargo, and it follows the river almost all the way. I think if a guy walked the whole distance, he’d probably walk 5 miles, but he couldn’t do it now. It’s submerged, but there’s hope. Just this week, Monday maybe or the next day, the Red inched below the official flood mark for the first time since the spring thaw.

What that means is not clear to most of us, but the weather predictors on television talked about it for 3 days, so it must mean something to someone. In some areas of our hiking trail, water doesn’t cover the area any more but mud does, so what the hell’s the difference? In that spot north of the Norwegian Boat Museum (honest, we’ve got a museum like that here) there are a bunch of low areas that still hold water, so the walking gets a little squishy and no one wants to go there except for some of those folks from South Dakota.

If there’s mud when the water goes away, there’s mud when it stays, too. Water makes almost everything slippery but so far no one’s put up a sign that says slippery when wet, so we just have to trust our experiences on this one. Come to think of it, if you add water to water, it doesn’t get any more slippery than it was, but I was referring to the mud, I think.

If you’d like to walk along the Red River of the North, come next year. It’s already September and the next thing you know, there’s going to be snow on top of the mud and then even those South Dakota people might stay home. Come next year, no earlier than June, no July. Maybe August. Or you could write to the Chamber of Commerce and they’ll send you a photo of our Norwegian Boat Museum and the place the St Bernard used to stay at. Be well. Be dry.


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