What is a funny joke for teens

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Here is a joke: Why did the fish get kicked out of school? Because he was caught with seaweed. Keep on doing the ChaCha! [ Source: http://www.chacha.com/question/what-is-a-funny-joke-for-teens ]
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What’s a funny joke for teens?
http://answers.kgb.com/whats-a-funny-joke-for-teens/1090321
Sin(x) walks into a bar and asks for drink. The barman declines: “We don’t cater for functions.
Who knows some awsome blond jokes or any funny teen joke??
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090203162256AAjd4ke
good joke. roffle well. a blonde buys a convertable, and wants the whole world to see it. she plops it in the middle of the road for all to see. soon, a pick-up comes barreling along, and almost kills himself from breaking so hard. so. he t…

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What are some good funny social jokes for teens in middle school?
Q: I am a middle school student and I would like to meet new people and I would like to make a good 1st impression by having ppl think that I’m funny and cool to hang around with. What would be some good jokes when meeting a new person? Who ever has the least corniest but funniest jokes gets the 10 points. ty
A: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AuCOqMj8sBu_oFKXn5mIJr3WxQt.;_ylv=3?qid=20080610182004AAXviZsyoul find lots there!!!goege w.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1no but seriouslythis is a good oneand its most likely going to get me best answerJack woke up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s ChristmasParty. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he as feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw was couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table.And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sat up and saw his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looked around the room and saw that it was in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So was the rest of the house. He took the aspirins, and cringed when he saw a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.Then he noticed a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: “Honey, breakfast is on the stove. I left early to getgroceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling!”He stumbled to the kitchen and sure enough, there was hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son was also at the table, eating. Jack asked, “Son, what happened last night?””Well, you came home after 3 A.M. , drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”Confused, he asked his son, “So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??His son replied, “Oh THAT! Mum dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, ‘Leave me alone bi!@h, I’m married!!!'”The head pharmacist goes out to lunch leaving the assistant pharmacist in charge.When the head pharmacist returns from lunch he notices a man leaning against the wall.He asked the assistant what was wrong with the man leaning against the wall over there.The assistant pharmacist says,”Oh that guy.Oh yeah he came in a little while ago with a really bad cough so I sold him a laxative.He seems to be doing ok now….. I guess.” The head pharmacist says,”Are you crazy?? You can’t sell a laxative to someone who has a bad cough like that!?” The assistant pharmacist says “Well why not?? Look at him over there! Its working! He’s too scared to cough now!!…..”An old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?” He replied, “Just doing what you said, Doc: ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'” The doctor said, “I didn’t say that. I said, ‘You’ve got a heart murmur; be careful.”a guy goes into a bar and sits beside a big lady.he says to her boy u have a big butt…she goes…why you…..and starts smacking him around.he goes in the mens room…fixes him self up….combs/fixes his hair…..straightens out his glasses…puts his teeth back in etc. He goes back and sits beside the same lady.He says to her….boy u got small boobs…..she says do i really…hes says yeah and i know how u can make em biger.She says how. He says you go into the ladies room,take your bra and shirt off….take a whole bunch of toilet paper and keep wiping and rubbing between your boobs…she says omg…do u think thatll really work for me/ He says why wouldnt it…it worked on your big butt didnt it…A bus stops and 2 men get on with really strong accents. They sit down andhave a conversation.The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but all of a sudden when she hears one of them say the following:”Emma come first. Den I come. Den two esses acoma together. Icome once-a-more. Two esses, they comma together again. Icome again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time.””You dirty-mouth pigs,” yelled the lady.” In this country . . . we don’t speak dirty in public places about our sex lives. . . “”Hey, relax lady whats sa-matter for you?,” said the man. “Who talkin’ aboutasex?I’m a justa tellin’ my frienda how to spell ‘Mississippi’.”so theres this doctor that did circumcisions.After many years he decides its time to retire.All the circumsicions he did over the years,he saved the foreskins.He took the big garbag full of foreskins to his friend who works at a leather company.He says”Make me something nice out of these foreskins,cuz im retiring.” His friend says”Come back in 2 weeks and ill have something nice for you.”So he goes in 2 weeks to see what his friend made him.When he shows up 2 weeks later,his friend presents him with 5 nice wallets. He says to his friend”wallets!? Is that all i get after all these years!?” His friend says”Relax my friend.You see its not just ordinary wallets. After you rub them for a while,it becomes a 5 piece luggage set.learn to speak chinese:1) That’s not right ………………….. Sum Ting Wong 2) Are you harboring a fugitive?…………. Hu Yu Hai Ding 3) See me ASAP………………………….. *** Hia Nao 4) Stupid Man ……………………… Dum *** 5) Small Horse ……………………. Tai Ni Po Ni 6) Did you go to the beach? ………… Wai Yu So Tan 7) I bumped into a coffee table …….. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni 8) I think you need a face lift ……….. Chin Tu Fat 9) It’s very dark in here …………….. Wao So Dim 10) I thought you were on a diet ……….. Wai Yu Mun Ching 11) This is a tow away zone ……………. No Pah King 12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week … Wai Yu *** Nao 13) Staying out of sight ……………. Lei Ying Lo 14) He’s cleaning his automobile ………. Wa Shing Ka 15) Your body odor is offensive ……….. Yu Stin Ki Pu 16) Great ……………………………. Fa Kin Su PahThere were these twin sisters just turning one hundred years old in St. Luke’s Nursing Home and the editor of the local newspaper told a photographer to get over there and take the pictures of these 100 year old twin biddies. One of the twins was hard of hearing but the other could hear quite well. The photographer asked them to sit on the sofa. The deaf one said to her twin, “WHAT DID HE SAY?” “WE GOTTA SIT OVER THERE ON THE SOFA!”, said the other. “Now get a little closer together”, said the cameraman. Again, “WHAT DID HE SAY?” “HE SAYS SQUEEZE TOGETHER A LITTLE”. So, they wiggled up close to each other. “Just hold on for a bit longer, I’ve got to focus a little,” said the photographer. Yet again – “WHAT DID HE SAY?” “HE SAYS HE’S GONNA FOCUS!” With a big grin the deaf twin shouted out, “OH MY GOD – BOTH OF US?
Teens & Pre-Teens: What’s the funniest joke you’ve heard yet?
Q: This one I heard from a question before, it’s pretty funny xDA female star decided to have a facelift for her 50th birthday..She spent $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper.Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?’About 32,’ is the reply.”Nope! I’m exactly 50,’ the woman says happily.A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question.The girl replies, ‘I’d guess about 29.’The woman replies with a big smile, ‘Nope, I’m 50.’Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street.She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question.The clerk responds, ‘Oh, I’d say 30.’Again she proudly responds, ‘I’m 50, but thank you!’While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.He replies, ‘Lady, I’m 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.’They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her.She finally blurts out, ‘What the hell, go ahead.’He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully.He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple.He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.After a couple of minutes of this, she says, ‘Okay, okay, enough now….How old am I?’He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, ‘Madam, you are 50.’Stunned and amazed, the woman says, ‘OMG, That is incredible, how could you tell?’The old man says, ‘Promise you won’t get mad?”I promise I won’t’ she says.”I was behind you at McDonalds.’If you thought this joke was funny star!Thumbs up jokes you think are funny! (no thumbs down 🙂 )
A: A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There’s a hole in one of the bags, and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement.Noticing this, a policeman stops her….”Ma’am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag…” “Damn!” says the little old lady…..”I’d better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!””Well, now, not so fast,” says the cop. “How did you get all that money?” ” Did you steal it?””Oh, no”, says the little old lady. “You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there’s a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes, right into my flower beds!””So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through the bushes, I say: $20 or off it comes!””Hey, not a bad idea!” laughs the cop. “OK, good luck! By the way, what’s in the other bag?””Well”, says the little old lady, “not all of them pay….”
what do u think is the funniest joke?
Q: i luv jokes not knock knock jokes but the ones that are witty and appropriate for a teen. so give me ur funniest joke and i mite pick it as the best answer.woah! hold on didnt i say that i dont like knock knock jokes ok now i did so plz send me jokes that u have 2 tell explain then at the end its funny get it? got it? good.
A: Q: What has 75 balls and screws old ladies?A: Bingo!
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